- The Brighter Side of Everything
- Posts
- We Miss Each Other By Inches
In partnership with
Welcome to The Brighter Side of Everything.
This newsletter serves a simple purpose → To help you build optimism, resilience and a solution-focused perspective.
Each week, I’ll share actionable insights that not only brighten your day but position you to be a leader within your own life and seize life’s opportunities.
Read time: 12-15 minutes.
We Miss Each Other by Inches - Not by miles.
Bright Reads - Quick links to fun or insightful articles.
Nina Kuscsik - The woman who changed the finish line.
Now Spinning - Play by Moby.
A Bright Idea to Consider - What you focus on, you find.
A Previous Post - A bridge burned is a future opportunity missed.
Positively Hilarious - Smile like you mean it.
Daily Gratitude Journal - Transform your daily routine through reflection.
Hello, Brighter Side readers! ☀️
This week, we’re shining a light on the power of small moments and quiet courage.
First up, I’m reflecting on how easy it is to miss what’s really going on with the people around us.
Sometimes, all it takes is a genuine “How are you, really?” to open up a conversation that matters.
It’s a reminder that we often miss each other by inches, not miles.
And while we’re on it, let me take this opportunity to thank you.
I’ve been blown away by the response to this newsletter and carry immense appreciation for each of you.
Thank you for reading along.
If you know anyone else who would benefit from a bit of optimism, please forward this newsletter.
We’re also celebrating the story of Nina Kuscsik.
A woman who changed the finish line for women everywhere.
Her quiet courage and refusal to accept “no” as an answer remind us that the most ordinary moments can spark extraordinary change.
Here’s to good chats, good people and finding inspiration in unexpected places.
Let’s dive in!
See you on the Brighter Side,
Chris
P.S. Please feel free to send me feedback on how I can improve. I respond to every email.
Start learning AI in 2025
Everyone talks about AI, but no one has the time to learn it. So, we found the easiest way to learn AI in as little time as possible: The Rundown AI.
It's a free AI newsletter that keeps you up-to-date on the latest AI news, and teaches you how to apply it in just 5 minutes a day.
Plus, complete the quiz after signing up and they’ll recommend the best AI tools, guides, and courses – tailored to your needs.
Last month, I caught up with a close friend.
Throughout the conversation, I could sense something was off.
He seemed distracted, like he wanted to say something but wasn’t sure if he should or how to begin.
All it took was saying, “You seem a little off, is everything ok?”
The floodgates opened.
It was like a pressure valve had been released.
Suddenly, he was speaking openly and honestly, without fear of judgment.
For the next thirty minutes, we had one of those deep conversations that don’t come around often enough.
He acknowledged a problem he was facing and shared his challenges.
Did we solve everything on the spot?
No.
Did we come up with a plan of action?
Not really.
I just listened, acknowledged and let him get what he needed off his chest.
Sometimes, that’s all it takes.
Sometimes, the right ear at the right time is worth more than a thousand words of advice.
As the conversation ended, I felt a wave of gratitude for the relationships I’ve built.
Friendships where we can be vulnerable with each other.
Where support and care are real and mutual.
I can’t speak highly enough of my friend group and the support they’ve shown me through tough times.
But it also made me wonder.
What if I hadn’t asked the question?
How often, across the globe, do people miss these moments simply because they don’t open the door to a genuine conversation?
The Myth of the “Big Talk”
How do two people who care about each other end up missing each other in a single conversation?
It’s rarely about a lack of love or willingness.
More often, it’s about timing, vulnerability and all those invisible weights we carry around.
We live in a world that prizes busyness.
When we finally carve out time to see a friend, we want to make it count.
But sometimes our worries or distractions get in the way.
We talk about work, the news and plans for the weekend.
Anything but the thing that’s really on our mind.
When we’re the one struggling, it’s easy to hope someone will notice and gently pry rather than risk burdening them or making them feel exposed.
We often imagine that real connection happens in grand gestures or deep, hours-long conversations.
But the truth?
Most of the time, it’s the small moments that matter.
A simple, “You seem a little off today, want to talk about it?” can open a door.
A pause.
A look.
A willingness to sit in silence together can be the invitation someone needs to share what’s really going on.
When those moments pass unspoken, the gap quietly grows.
Sometimes, it’s so subtle we hardly notice.
But it still leaves us feeling a bit more alone.
Why is this important?
Because these small moments of connection aren’t just nice to have, they’re actually vital for our health.
Research shows that people with strong, supportive friendships are much more likely to live longer.
About 50% more likely.
That’s right up there with the benefits of exercise or quitting smoking.
So when we let these little moments slip by, we’re not just missing out on a good conversation and building lifelong connections.
We’re missing out on something genuinely good for our well-being.
“Friends are those rare people who ask how we are, and then wait to hear the answer.”
What Keeps Us Silent?
We usually think of “missed connections” as those fleeting moments with strangers.
You know the ones?
A glance on the subway, or a smile at a coffee shop.
Even a conversation that never quite gets to “Can I have your number?”
But the most impactful missed connections?
They happen with the people closest to us.
Friends, partners, siblings.
Those we assume will always be there, the ones who know us best.
The irony is, it’s often with them that the little gaps matter most.
We expect them to read our minds, notice our silences and ask the right questions.
And when they don’t, it stings.
So, why do we hold back?
Sometimes it’s fear.
Of being a burden, of making things awkward, of not being understood.
Sometimes, it’s pride.
Or the belief that we should be able to handle things on our own (I know that’s usually my poorly formed reasoning).
And other times, it’s just habit.
We’ve gotten so used to keeping things light that we forget how to go deeper.
Alternatively, we might be so wrapped up in our own world that we miss the cues.
Like a friend’s quietness, or their forced smile.
We assume if something were wrong, they’d tell us.
But often, the person hurting most is the one least likely to ask for help.
The Cost of Inches
What’s the real cost of these missed inches?
Maybe it’s just a twinge of regret as you drive home, wishing you’d asked one more question.
Maybe it’s a growing sense of distance, a feeling that your friendship isn’t as close as it once was.
Over time, these small gaps can add up.
Potentially leaving both people feeling unseen and unheard.
And the stakes are higher than we think.
When we miss these moments, we’re not just missing out on a good conversation.
We’re missing out on the deep, health-boosting benefits that genuine connection and supportive friendships provide.
Our well-being, happiness and even longevity are tied to our ability to bridge those quiet gaps and connect fully with others.
How Do We Bridge the Gap?
Here’s the good news.
Bridging those inches doesn’t require grand gestures or perfect timing.
It just takes a little courage and a lot of presence.
So, what can you do?
Ask Twice: Sometimes, “How are you?” isn’t enough. Try, “No, really, how are you doing?” That second ask can make all the difference.
Notice the Small Stuff: Pay attention to changes in your friend’s mood, energy, or habits. A gentle, “You seem quiet today, is everything okay?” can be an opening.
Share First: Vulnerability is contagious. If you share something real, your friend may feel safer doing the same.
Make Space for Silence: Not every gap needs to be filled with words. Often, just sitting together in quiet is enough to show you care.
Circle Back: If you realise you missed a moment, reach out later. “Hey, I realised you seemed off yesterday. I’m here if you want to talk.”
My Takeaway
Here’s what I’ve learned.
The inches between us are small, but they matter.
Most of the time, we don’t need to leap across chasms.
We just need to take one step closer.
Whether you’re the friend who needs to be seen, or the one who needs to look a little harder, real connections are built in these everyday moments of genuine care.
The keyword in that sentence?
Genuine.
So next time you’re with a friend, pause.
Look beyond the surface.
Ask the extra question.
Because it’s in those inches that we find each other, and ourselves.
“Deep listening is the kind of listening that can help relieve the suffering of another person. You can call it compassionate listening. You listen with only one purpose: to help him or her to empty his heart.”
An immersive ‘flow state’ isn’t only accessible to great artists and athletes.
The Feelings Wheel: unlock the power of your emotions.
Quick-thinking elephant rescues a drowning gazelle with its trunk.
Can humans live under the sea? This live experiment plans to find out.
First-of-its-kind technology helps man with ALS speak in real time.
Nina Kuscsik - born 2nd January 1939, Long Island, New York.
The morning of the 1969 Boston Marathon was alive with energy.
Runners bouncing on their toes.
The scent of anticipation in the air.
Shoes double-knotted and final preparations made for the 26.2 miles ahead.
But tucked among the crowd, Nina Kuscsik stood out for reasons most couldn’t see.
The rules were clear at the time: women weren’t allowed to run.
Yet there she was.
A mother of three, champion cyclist and quiet force.
Standing at the starting line anyway.
Not because she was welcome, but because she refused to let the word “no” define her.
With calm determination, Nina readied herself to challenge the impossible, one courageous step at a time.
Breaking Barriers Before the Gun
Nina Kuscsik’s journey to that start line began long before Boston.
She grew up in Brooklyn, where running shoes were a luxury and a running track was a distant dream.
She played stickball and roller-skated with friends, hitchhiking to rinks and racing with a determination that would become her trademark.
By her late teens, she was a New York state champion in roller skating, speed skating and cycling.
She was a natural athlete who never saw a finish line she couldn’t cross.
Running came later, discovered out of necessity when her bike broke down.
Inspired by a $1 copy of Jogging, she started running laps around her neighbourhood.
Often training with men because there simply weren’t other women.
She balanced the miles with motherhood, raising three children as a single mum.
Quietly building the endurance that would one day change the sport.
“I've always felt running is a form of meditation. Running enables us to stop our lives, to go out and find a safe place for ourselves.”
The Race Before the Race
In 1969, Nina ran the Boston Marathon unofficially.
Her name was missing from the entry list, and her time was missing from the results.
She finished in 3:46, but the race didn’t acknowledge her.
For most, that would have been the end.
For Nina, it was just the beginning.
She kept showing up, running races and making herself impossible to ignore.
In 1971, she proposed to the Amateur Athletic Union (AAU) to end the ban on women and allow them to race officially.
The AAU budged, slightly.
They raised the maximum distance for women to 10 miles and, in “special cases,” allowing marathons.
But there was a catch.
Women had to start separately from the men.
That rule set the stage for one of Nina’s defining moments.
Image sourced from the Chicago Tribune.
At the 1972 New York City Marathon, she and five other women lined up at the start.
When the gun went off, they sat down in protest, refusing to accept a separate start.
The press snapped photos.
The story spread.
And the AAU finally dropped the separate start rule.
That same year, Nina became the first official female winner of the Boston and New York City Marathons.
Shattering records and expectations.
More Than Medals
Nina’s legacy is about more than finish times.
She was an activist behind the scenes, co-founding the AAU Women’s Long Distance Running Committee and pushing for women’s marathoning to be included in the Olympics.
She mentored countless women, championed fairness at every turn and never stopped fighting for a sport that welcomed everyone.
She faced skepticism, criticism and outright dismissal, but she kept running.
Sometimes doubted by those who thought women couldn’t handle the distance.
Sometimes she was stopped by police for running alone.
Through every setback and every victory, Nina pressed forward with a quiet, unwavering strength.
She had a deep conviction that every woman deserves the chance to chase her own finish line.
Her story is threaded with that sense of freedom.
The belief that possibility expands each time someone dares to step up and claim it.
These days, countless women run marathons and break barriers that were once thought insurmountable.
Next time you see thousands of women gathered at the start of a marathon, their nerves buzzing and hopes gleaming.
Know that Nina’s legacy lives on with every step they take.
Lessons from Nina
Nina Kuscsik’s story is about more than medals.
It’s about:
Persistence: She kept showing up, even when her efforts went unnoticed. True progress often happens quietly, with steady determination.
Community: Nina believed in lifting others, not just herself. Real change grows when we support and inspire those around us.
Courage: She stood up for fairness, even when it meant standing alone or sitting down in protest. Sometimes, bravery means challenging the status quo.
My Takeaway
Nina Kuscsik’s life is proof that the finish line isn’t just for the fastest.
It’s for the bold.
She showed us that sometimes, the most important races are the ones we run for others, not just ourselves.
Whether you’re an athlete or someone trying to break your own barriers, Nina’s story is a reminder to keep pushing, keep fighting and keep showing up.
Nina’s legacy is all around us.
Every time a woman crosses a marathon finish line, she’s running in Nina’s footsteps.
But progress doesn’t just happen.
It takes someone willing to speak up, to protest, to keep running even when the world says “stop.”
Kuscsik didn’t just change the rules.
She redefined what was possible.
The finish line, she proved, belongs to anyone bold enough to claim it.
"Running gives freedom. When you run you can determine your own tempo. You can choose your own course and think whatever you want. Nobody tells you what to do."
Sadly, Nina Kuscsik passed away on the 8th June 2025, if you’d like to hear more of her story, check out this short video:
Discover the Trends Shaping Tomorrow
Art, music, sports, entertainment, movies, and many other subjects—these elements define who we are as a society and how we express ourselves as a culture. Take a deep dive into the topics shaping our shared norms, values, institutions, and more.
Why It’s Worth Your Time
Last week, I threw Moby’s Play on the record player, and instantly, I was transported back to the late 90s / early 2000s.
It brought back vivid memories of my first trip overseas to Thailand in 2001.
Probably thanks to the hauntingly beautiful track “Porcelain,” which featured in the soundtrack of The Beach.
I didn’t expect an album from 1999 to feel so fresh and calming, but Play is one of those rare records that’s perfect for both relaxing and getting work done.
It’s a time machine and a mood-setter all in one.
What Makes It Stand Out
Innovative Sampling: Moby weaves blues, gospel and folk samples into lush electronic soundscapes.
Signature Tracks: Songs like “Porcelain,” “Natural Blues,” and “Honey” blend unique vocals and melodies that linger long after listening.
Atmospheric Flow: The album moves seamlessly from energetic, beat-driven tracks to gentle, introspective instrumentals, taking you on a journey.
Emotional Resonance: There’s a bittersweet but hopeful quality throughout, making it both comforting and thought-provoking.
Did You Know?
Play was the first album to have all its tracks licensed for use in films, TV shows or commercials.
This clever approach helped it reach a wider audience and contributed to its massive commercial success.
Making it a pioneer in how music can be marketed and enjoyed.
My Takeaway
Revisiting Play turned an ordinary evening into a reflective experience.
The calming rhythms and evocative melodies made me slow down and savour the moment.
“Porcelain” always takes me back to that first adventure abroad.
Whether you’re looking for music to relax to, work to, or simply get lost in, Play offers a perfect balance.
It’s electronica with heart and history and a must-have for any collection.
"Moby’s Play is a landmark album that blends electronica with blues and gospel samples, creating a deeply emotional and innovative soundscape. It’s both hypnotic and accessible, a rare feat in electronic music."
Got a recommendation?
Please share; I'm always keen for great suggestions.
The Lesson
Ever noticed that once you start thinking about something, say, a yellow car.
You suddenly see them everywhere?
It’s not that the world is suddenly full of yellow cars.
It’s that your mind is tuned in, so you spot them more easily.
The same thing happens with opportunities, frustrations, even happiness.
What we focus on has a funny way of showing up all around us.
This week’s bright idea is simple but powerful:
You become what you constantly think about.
So, be mindful of where you aim your attention.
Go Deeper
Our brains are wired to notice what we expect to see.
Psychologists call this the “frequency illusion” or “Baader-Meinhof phenomenon.”
When something is on your mind, your brain highlights it in your environment.
If you’re always looking for reasons to be upset, you’ll find them.
If you’re on the lookout for opportunities, you’ll spot them too.
Think about a time you were excited about a new hobby or goal.
Suddenly, related articles, conversations and chances to learn more seemed to pop up everywhere (and I don’t mean the creepy way our phones listen to us).
It’s not magic.
It’s your mind filtering the world through your new interest.
It also works in the negative.
If you wake up grumpy and expect a bad day, every little annoyance feels bigger.
This idea matters because it puts the power back in your hands.
You can’t control everything that happens, but you can choose what you focus on.
Over time, those choices shape your experiences, your mood and even your future.
Practical Steps
Here are a few simple ways to put this idea into practice this week:
Pick Your Focus: Each morning, decide on one positive thing you want to notice. It might be kindness, creativity or opportunity. Write it down or say it out loud.
Catch Your Thoughts: Throughout the day, check in with yourself. Are you stuck on negative thoughts, or are you looking for the good stuff? Gently redirect if you need to.
Celebrate Your Finds: When you spot what you’re looking for, pause and appreciate it. These small wins add up.
Share Your Experience: Tell a friend or jot down what you noticed. Talking about it also helps reinforce your new focus.
My Takeaway
I’ve found that when I consciously choose what to look for, whether it’s opportunities, gratitude, or even just moments of calm, my days feel lighter and more meaningful.
Of course, I still have the odd grumpy morning or stressful moment, but I try to gently steer my attention back to what I want more of in my life.
It’s not about ignoring problems.
It’s about not letting them take over.
So, what will you look for this week?
I’d love to hear what you notice when you shift your focus.
"Watch your thoughts, for they become words. Watch your words, for they become actions. Watch your actions, for they become habits. Watch your habits, for they become character. Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny."
A bridge burned is a future opportunity missed.
"The bridge you burn today may be the one you have to cross tomorrow."
🖊- Unknown 🔅
— Chris | The Brighter Side of Everything (@thebsofe)
2:19 PM • Jun 3, 2025
Transform your daily routine with my specially crafted gratitude journal.
Start (or end) each day with a moment of reflection and positivity.
As you develop daily your gratitude, you're also helping grant wishes to children facing critical illnesses.
It's a powerful cycle of hope and optimism.
🌟 What's Inside:
Thoughtful prompts to inspire daily gratitude.
Space for personal reflections and affirmations.
Beautifully designed pages to make each entry a delightful experience.
Ready to embrace the power of gratitude?
Click here to order a copy now!
|
|
|
What did you think of this week's edition? |
New to this newsletter? - Subscribe for free and join the Brighter Side!
Follow on Medium for longer form content - @TheBSofE
Follow on X for daily insights from the Brighter Side - @TheBSofE
