Stop Assuming the Worst

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Welcome to The Brighter Side of Everything.

This newsletter serves a simple purpose → To help you build optimism, resilience and a solution-focused perspective.

Each week, I’ll share actionable insights that not only brighten your day but position you to be a leader within your own life and seize life’s opportunities.

Read time: 12-15 minutes.

Bright Side in Brief

What’s covered this week?

• Stop Assuming the Worst - Seek the facts, don't rely on the story in your head.

• Bright Reads - Quick links to fun or insightful articles.

• John Landy - The champion who stopped to help.

• Elevated Viewing - Rise of the assholes.

• A Bright Idea to Consider - Scientific benefits of positive thinking.

• A Previous Post - It’s ok to have bad days.

• Positively Hilarious - Smile like you mean it.

• Daily Gratitude Journal - Transform your daily routine through reflection.

Hello, Brighter Side readers! ☀️

Ever find yourself caught in a loop?

Spinning stories in your head about what might happen?

Only to realise most of it never does.

This week, we’re talking about how to stop assuming the worst and why it’s so easy to get tangled up in the stories we tell ourselves.

We’ll also take a look at John Landy’s incredible moment of sportsmanship.

A reminder that true character isn’t just about winning, but how you show up when it matters most.

It’s one of those stories that sticks with you, and honestly, I think we could all use a little more of that spirit these days.

And if you’re looking for something to watch, I recommend a fascinating documentary that really makes you think about the kind of behaviour we tolerate in society.

It’s eye-opening and, in my humble opinion, well worth your time.

Have a great week!

See you on the Brighter Side,

Chris

P.S. Please feel free to send me feedback on how I can improve. I respond to every email.

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Stop Assuming the Worst

Seek the facts, don't rely on the story in your head.

Ever sent a message to a friend, only to get a one-word reply in return?

Or nothing at all?

Maybe it was a simple “ok” or “sure”.

Or just a quick “like”.

Suddenly, your mind starts racing.

Did I say something wrong?

Are they annoyed with me?

You replay the conversation in your head, inventing stories about what you might have done.

Before you know it, you’re feeling anxious.

Maybe even hurt.

If you’re nodding along, you’re not alone.

I often wonder (strange thing to ponder, I know) how many situations occur like this every day across the globe.

Moments where assumptions are made and relationships are impacted.

For little or no reason whatsoever.

How many situations escalate or fizzle out because something was left unsaid or a message was misread?

We make assumptions.

We build stories in our heads.

And those stories start to feel like facts.

All because we didn’t “close the loop” with a real conversation.

Here’s the good news, though.

There’s a way to break this cycle.

It comes down to two learnable skills: emotional intelligence and effective communication.

Combine these skills and you’ll not only stop assuming the worst.

You’ll build stronger, more resilient relationships.

Why We Jump to Conclusions

Our brains are wired to fill in the blanks, especially when missing information.

If someone goes quiet or acts a little off, it can jump to the worst-case scenario.

Even when we know that the scenario is unlikely.

It’s a survival instinct, but it can wreak havoc on our relationships, especially in the modern world.

How many friendships, work partnerships, or family bonds are being quietly eroded by nothing more than a misunderstanding?

Too many to count, perhaps.

It’s absurd to think about, and another indication that deep, trustworthy relationships are far more valuable than surface-level relationships.

When you engage in and encourage open dialogue and empathy in your relationships, you bridge these gaps.

Preserving the relationships that matter most.

Why?

Trust breaks through assumption.

We’re far more likely to close the loop with someone we know and trust.

How do we create that level of trust?

By failing to make assumptions and closing unnecessary loops.

The Power of Emotional Intelligence and Communication

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is about recognising and managing your emotions, while also tuning into what others may be feeling.

It’s the difference between spiralling into anxiety over a friend’s silence and pausing to consider - “Maybe they’re just having a tough week.”

Extensive research shows people with higher EQ handle stress better, resolve conflicts more smoothly, and build trust more easily.

In fact, Harvard Business Review notes that EQ is a stronger predictor of success in relationships and the workplace than IQ.

But even the most emotionally intelligent person can’t read minds.

That’s where effective communication comes in.

What makes communication effective?

Expressing yourself clearly.

Asking the right questions.

And most crucially, listening without judgment.

How many times have you let a misunderstanding simmer?

Only to discover later that a simple, honest conversation could have cleared everything up.

So much unnecessary drama could be avoided if we all just had the courage to ask:

“Is everything okay?”

Or

“Did I misunderstand something?”

The best part, though?

EQ and communication aren’t just traits you’re born with.

They’re skills you can build.

Like muscles, they get stronger the more you use them.

Regular self-reflection, empathy exercises and real conversations all help boost these abilities.

How to Build Your EQ and Communication Muscles

If you’re thinking, “That sounds great, but I’m not naturally good at this,” don’t worry.

These are skills you can absolutely develop.

Here’s how to get started:

• Pause and Reflect: When you notice yourself making assumptions, stop and ask: “What else could be true here?” Consider a range of explanations, from the worst-case to the best-case scenario.

• Practice Empathy: Put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Are they under stress? Could something unrelated to you be going on? Do you trust them?

• Ask Open-Ended Questions: Instead of stewing in silence, reach out. Try, “I noticed you’ve been quiet lately, is everything okay?” or “I wanted to check in about our last conversation, did I miss something?”

• Listen (Really Listen): When the other person responds, focus on understanding, not just replying. Reflect back what you hear and ask clarifying questions to make sure you understand.

• Keep Practicing: Like any muscle, your emotional intelligence and communication skills get stronger the more you use them. Seek feedback, reflect on your interactions and don’t be afraid to make mistakes, they’re how we learn.

The Courage to Build Bridges

It truly takes courage to build bridges.

It takes strength to forgive.

It takes trust to assume the best in others.

These days, it can often feel easier to retreat, hold grudges, or let misunderstandings fester.

But choosing connection over division is a powerful act of courage and empathy.

It requires us to actively listen, seek common ground and approach others with an open heart and mind.

By prioritising connection, we build understanding, develop stronger relationships and create a more harmonious community.

Honestly, I can’t imagine (and honestly, don’t want to imagine) a world where that type of courage disappears.

We need more people who are willing to be part of the solution.

People who reach out instead of pulling away.

Who ask tough questions instead of making silent assumptions.

And those who are brave enough to forgive and move forward.

Every time we do this, we make our relationships, and our communities, a little stronger.

My Takeaway

Let’s circle back to that misread text.

Instead of letting your imagination run wild, what if you simply picked up the phone and called your friend?

Maybe they’d laugh and explain they were rushing between appointments and didn’t mean to be abrupt.

Suddenly, the story in your head disappears.

Replaced by the truth.

Not only does this mend a “fake or misrepresented” situation.

It also frees up your mental space for more pressing, real situations that need your attention.

When you let go of imagined dramas and clarify misunderstandings, you reclaim energy that would otherwise be spent worrying and overthinking.

And both worrying and overthinking are like a rocking chair.

They give you something to do, but they will never get you anywhere.

Feeling anxious about something that was never real in the first place is like trying to untangle a knot in a rope that doesn't exist.

It drains your energy and attention without giving you any real results.

This is why it’s crucial to close the loop with facts, not fiction.

The mental clarity allows you to focus on what truly matters.

Your work, your goals and the relationships that deserve your energy.

So many relationships would be stronger if you just had the courage to close the loop.

To ask the awkward question, to clarify the misunderstanding, to say what we’re really feeling.

It takes guts, yes, but the payoff is huge.

Less anxiety, fewer assumptions and deeper connections.

This week, if you catch yourself spinning a story in your head, try reaching out instead.

Ask the question you need to ask.

Start a conversation and see what happens.

You might be surprised by how much lighter and more connected you feel when you close the loop with facts.

Not fiction.

Bright Reads

Interesting insights to ignite your inner optimist.

• Meet the man who gave rock’n’roll its name.

• The mystery of lightning may finally be solved.

• This simple '30-second rule' can help you win every conversation.

• 'I'm a professional cuddler - let me tell you why a hug feels so good'.

• A Doctor’s science-backed formula for aging better.

John Landy

The Champion Who Stopped to Help

When we talk about sports heroes, we usually think of world records and gold medals.

But sometimes, the most powerful moments in sports come from a simple act of character.

Imagine this.

The stadium is roaring.

Every second matters.

And a spot at the Olympics is on the line.

Suddenly, a runner falls.

What would you do?

The Miracle Mile: A Duel for the Ages

Before we get to Landy’s most famous act of sportsmanship, it’s important to understand his place in the pantheon of running legends.

In 1954, the world of athletics was electrified by the prospect of the first sub-four-minute mile.

Roger Bannister of England broke the barrier in May with a time of 3:59.4.

Just 46 days later, John Landy of Australia shattered Bannister’s record, running 3:58.0 in Turku, Finland.

The stage was set for a historic showdown at the British Empire and Commonwealth Games in Vancouver, Canada.

On August 7, 1954, over 35,000 fans packed Empire Stadium to witness what was promoted as “The Mile of the Century,” later immortalised as “The Miracle Mile.”

It was the first time two sub-four-minute milers would face off in the same race.

Landy led for most of the race, setting a blistering pace.

But with only 90 yards to go, he glanced over his left shoulder to check Bannister’s position.

A split-second decision.

At that very moment, Bannister surged past him on the right, claiming victory in a Commonwealth record 3:58.8.

Landy finished just behind in 3:59.6.

It was the first time two men had run under four minutes in the same race

The moment Landy looked back is forever captured in a statue outside the stadium.

This race wasn’t just about speed.

It was about pushing human limits and mutual respect between two giants of the sport.

Landy’s Defining Moment

Yet, for many, Landy’s most enduring legacy isn’t the Miracle Mile.

It’s what happened two years later at the 1956 Australian National Championships.

The stakes were high.

Olympic selection was on the line.

During the 1500-meter final, Ron Clarke, a promising young runner, tripped and fell right in front of Landy.

In a split second, Landy leapt over Clarke but accidentally spiked him.

Most athletes, in the heat of competition, would keep running.

But Landy did something different.

He stopped, turned back and helped Clarke to his feet.

Only after he had confirmed he was ok did he return to the race.

After losing precious seconds, Landy could have given up.

Instead, he dug deep, found another gear and started chasing the pack.

With the crowd on its feet, Landy overtook one runner after another.

In a finish that’s become legendary, he not only caught up but won the race.

It’s the ultimate example of winning while maintaining your integrity.

Landy didn’t just help a competitor.

He proved you can be fiercely competitive and still a champion in every sense of the word.

Why Integrity Matters in Sports (and in Life)

What Landy did wasn’t about weakness or “letting up.”

It was about holding himself to a higher standard.

He showed that being a champion isn’t just about being ruthless or doing “whatever it takes” to win.

It’s about striving for excellence while keeping your values intact.

While many often focus on cheating and shortcuts, moments like Landy’s are more important than ever.

They remind us that true greatness is about more than just results.

It’s about how you get there.

Landy’s Legacy

Landy’s acts of sportsmanship have been described as among the finest sporting moments ever.

There’s a bronze statue outside Melbourne’s Olympic Park commemorating his gesture to Ron Clarke and another in Vancouver capturing the famous glance from the Miracle Mile.

A lasting symbol of integrity and compassion for generations to come.

We should celebrate these moments more.

They show young athletes, and anyone striving to be their best, that you don’t have to sacrifice your values to succeed.

In fact, it’s those values that set you apart and inspire others long after the results are forgotten.

Landy’s reputation for integrity and sportsmanship extends far beyond a single race.

He was widely respected in the sports world, especially in Australia and among athletics enthusiasts globally.

He was not just a record-breaking runner.

He was a pioneer, a mentor and a role model.

After his athletic career, he served as Governor of Victoria and contributed significantly to environmental conservation.

His influence stretched well past his competitive years, inspiring generations of athletes with his high standards, humility and generosity.

Although he never won an Olympic gold, his performances, character and legacy place him among the true greats of sport.

His name remains synonymous with true sportsmanship.

Lessons From John Landy

• Integrity over advantage: Doing the right thing, even when it costs you, is the mark of a true champion.

• Compassion in competition: You can care for others and still give your all.

• True greatness is character: Records may fall, but respect and honour last forever.

• Sportsmanship inspires: Landy’s story encourages all of us to play fair, support others, and lead by example.

My Takeaway

John Landy’s story powerfully reminds us that the best victories are those won with integrity.

It’s not about being soft or holding back.

It’s about pushing yourself to the limit while still retaining the best qualities of a champion.

Right up until his death in 2022, he still believed that what he did in that race didn’t warrant a fuss.

And that’s what makes him special.

So next time you’re faced with a tough decision, on the field or in life, remember Landy’s example.

Winning is great, but winning with honour?

That’s unforgettable.

If you have two minutes, check out the footage of the race itself:

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Elevated Viewing

Rise of the Assholes: Why Do We Keep Rewarding Bad Behaviour?

CBC Documentary

Ever feel like the world is getting ruder by the day?

Like the loudest, pushiest people are the ones getting ahead?

At work, in politics, even in line at the coffee shop?

You’re definitely not alone.

This week, I watched CBC’s documentary Rise of the Assholes: Why Do We Keep Rewarding Bad Behaviour?

It’s the eye-opener we all need right now.

Why It’s Worth Your Time

This film isn’t just a rant about bad apples.

Instead, it digs deep into why our culture seems to celebrate, and even reward, jerks, bullies and narcissists.

Inspired by Aaron James’ bestselling book and brought to life by director John Walker, the documentary takes us everywhere from frat houses and Wall Street boardrooms to Silicon Valley and beyond, asking:

How did we get here?

And more importantly, how do we turn this ship around?

It’s packed with sharp insights and some laugh-out-loud moments (John Cleese, anyone?) but doesn’t shy away from the hard stuff.

We hear from people who’ve had to stand up to toxic bosses, bullies and even whole organisations built around bad behaviour.

It’s not just about calling out the problem.

It’s about understanding the environments where this behaviour thrives and what we can do to push back.

And let’s be real.

Standing up to this kind of negativity takes guts.

It’s like being the one who raises their hand in a noisy room.

It’s not easy but sometimes that one voice can change the whole conversation.

Why the Loudest Get the Spotlight

• Jerks Attract Attention: The documentary nails how the media and social platforms often give the worst offenders the biggest megaphones. It’s like we can’t look away and sometimes we even cheer them on, until we have to work for one.

• Toxic Culture Has Consequences: From the 2008 financial crisis to everyday workplace misery, the film shows how letting bad behaviour slide can have real, lasting damage.

• It’s Not Hopeless: There are stories of people who’ve fought back and won, like former RCMP officer Sherry Lee Benson-Podolchuk, who took on a culture of bullying and helped spark real change in her organisation. Her story is a great reminder that it takes real courage to challenge toxic environments, but it’s absolutely possible.

What You Can Do (Yes, You!)

So, what can we actually do about it?

Here are some simple but powerful steps you can take:

• Don’t Feed the Trolls: Sometimes the best move is to stop giving attention to the worst behaviour, online and in real life.

• Call It Out (When You Can): If it’s safe, speak up. Sometimes one brave voice is all it takes to start a ripple. It takes nerve to push back, but your courage might inspire others to do the same.

• Support the Good Eggs: Cheer on the folks who lead with kindness, empathy and respect. They need backup, too.

• Check Your Own Habits: We all have our moments, so a little self-awareness goes a long way.

My Takeaway

Watching Rise of the Assholes really drove home how much we need to rethink what kind of behavior we tolerate, and even reward, in our world today.

While it might be easy to dismiss outrageous stories with a laugh.

The reality is that tolerating or even encouraging rude, selfish, or toxic behavior comes at a cost to all of us.

Here’s the bright side: real change begins with each of us.

When we stay silent or look the other way, we’re basically giving a thumbs-up to bad behaviour.

But when we speak up and refuse to go along with the nonsense, we start to shift the culture.

And yes, it takes courage to do that.

It’s not always comfortable to be the one who says “enough,” but that’s how things start to change.

And it’s not just on us as individuals.

There are countless great leaders out there who get it.

But they definitely need to be more vocal.

One of my favourite moments in the documentary comes from the chairman of Baird, who states:

“We’re not going to hire or tolerate anyone who puts themselves ahead of the clients or the firm, and we’re only going to do business with people of high integrity. When I’m recruiting people I tell everybody the same thing: if you’re an asshole, don’t come, we’ll figure it out and fire you.”

It’s rare to hear a leader be this blunt and clear about zero tolerance for bad behavior.

That’s exactly why it stands out.

Imagine if every company had that kind of standard.

What if there were an “integrity rating” for businesses, right there with their credit score?

The world would look a lot different.

Let’s be honest.

Being rude or mean isn’t a sign of strength.

It usually comes from insecurity or fear.

Anyone can act like a jerk but it takes real guts to stay positive, keep your cool and lift others up.

Especially when negativity seems to grab all the spotlight.

Choosing to stay hopeful and kind isn’t always the easiest path.

It takes effort, patience and a lot of inner strength.

So if you’re fed up with seeing bad behaviour rewarded, remember this: you have more power than you think.

Change starts with the small choices we make every day.

In how we act, what we tolerate, and who we support.

Being positive and encouraging takes more courage than being a bully and that’s the kind of strength the world needs right now.

Want to watch it for yourself? Check out the YouTube link below:

Got a recommendation?

Please share; I'm always keen for great suggestions.

A Bright Idea to Consider

Scientific Benefits of Positive Thinking

The Lesson

We’ve all heard the advice to “think positive”.

But let’s be honest here.

Sometimes it feels a little too simple.

Can a good attitude really make a difference when life gets stressful or things don’t go our way?

Science says yes.

And the benefits are bigger than you might think.

Positive thinking isn’t about ignoring reality or pretending everything is perfect.

It’s about focusing on what you can control, noticing the good even in tough times and believing that setbacks are temporary.

It’s a mindset shift and it’s got some real science behind it.

Let’s look at what positive thinking can do for you.

Why Positive Thinking Matters

It’s a Stress Buster
When you practice positive thinking, your body responds. Studies show that optimists tend to have lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol. That means less tension, fewer headaches and a calmer mind. Instead of spiralling into worry, positive thinkers are more likely to look for solutions and bounce back from challenges.

It Makes You Feel in Control
It helps you see that you have choices, even when things feel overwhelming. Instead of feeling stuck, you start to notice small steps you can take to improve your situation. This sense of control is powerful. It boosts your confidence and helps you handle whatever comes your way.

It Improves Your Quality of Life—Literally
The benefits of positive thinking aren’t just in your head. Research shows that people with a positive outlook tend to have better heart health, stronger immune systems and even live longer. They report higher levels of happiness and satisfaction with life. It’s not magic. It’s your mind and body working together to help you thrive.

Practical Ways to Practice Positive Thinking

• Start with Gratitude:
  Each day, write down one thing you’re grateful for. It can be big or small. This simple habit trains your brain to notice the good.

• Reframe Challenges:
  When something goes wrong, ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?” or “Is there a silver lining here?” It’s not about denying problems, but about finding growth in them.

• Surround Yourself with Positivity:
  Spend time with people who lift you up. Read, watch, or listen to things that inspire you.

• Talk Kindly to Yourself:
  Notice your inner voice. If you catch yourself being harsh, try speaking to yourself the way you’d encourage a friend.

• Take Small Positive Actions:
  Do something each day that makes you feel good, whether it’s a walk outside, a favorite hobby, or just a few deep breaths.

My Takeaway

Positive thinking isn’t a cure-all.

It’s a powerful tool you can use every single day.

It helps you handle stress, feel more in control and actually enjoy life more.

Backed by real science, not just wishful thinking.

For example, think of someone facing a tough work deadline.

Instead of panicking, they focus on what they can control, break the project into small steps and remind themselves of past successes.

That shift in mindset doesn’t make the work disappear.

It does make the process less overwhelming, though, and often leads to a better outcome.

The next time you feel overwhelmed or stuck, try shifting your focus.

Look for one thing that’s going right, or one small step you can take.

Over time, these little shifts add up to a big difference.

Remember, it’s not about being positive all the time.

It’s about choosing hope, even when things are hard.

That choice can change everything.

What’s one positive thought you can hold onto today?

I’d love to hear it.

A previous post …

Positively Hilarious

A quick laugh as we part ways this week.

Daily Gratitude Journal

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